the orchids & arbours of ardis 
towers, broken bridges, fogs, and real things

[[Home]]     [[Archives]]

Wednesday, December 05, 2001

I'm supposed to be typing an essay. I'm supposed to be typing 3 essays, actually. Instead I'm procrastinating. I've finished searching the names of everyone I know (or rather, everyone I'm currently interested in) & found that one of them had a site here. I was even mentioned, although not in a very favourable way. It's unfortunate that I'd have to admit to being snoopy in order to bitch at him for the things he wrote.

I think maybe if I can just write down all the things that are bugging me, I can finally finish these essays(one is 10 days late, the other 2 are both 2 days late). I have an exam tomorrow & I really should be studying for it, although I think I went to enough classes that I won't have to do too much besides look up coles notes for the plays. Hopefully I can improvise.

There's just not enought time, or else maybe it's too much time, in the day. Maybe if I didn't live alone I wouldn't feel the need to spend so much time talking to people online & reading forums. I mean, I know I should just focus & spend the whole day glued to the computer & then I'd be done. I would stop calculating how many days late my papers are when I wake up.

Maybe if I had room-mates, I wouldn't feel so stir-crazy & stifled. Instead, I feel like I owe myself breaks because otherwise it's just me writing alone & when I'm done nothing will have changed except that I've exhausted myself & got some essays off my back. I admit that getting the essays off my back is what I want right now more than anything, but, for some reason, I can't actually do it.

I'm curious about what this looks like, so I'm going to post now & see what I want to change about the format.
Adelaida posted this at 1:29 PM.